Corporate Jargon – You Gotta Love It

You gotta love this…if you work in an office, you most certainly have heard the following sample list of corporate jargon. Perhaps you haven’t heard all of them, but I am sure you have had the pleasure of listening to the cooler people in your office rattle these things off, day in and day out. FYI – this is not an exhaustive list…I am going to add on to it as I hear them. Please feel free to add your own as a comment.

– “At the end of the day” (number 1 of all time)
– “Brainchild” – whoever thought of this word needs to be punched in the face
– COB – Close of business
– I need to to “champion” this (spearhead) (ooohhh, that’s really annoying)
– I have to go “put out a few fires”
– It’s a horse race
– Push the envelope
– Don’t “reinvent the wheel”
– Best of breed (oh, that’s annoying)
– Let’s have a power (working) lunch
– It’s great to finally “touch base” with you
– Seems like we are playing “phone tag…you’re it”
– Let’s circle back around tomorrow
– I think we’ve got a “key player” here
– Please keep me “in the loop”
– I wanted to give you a “heads up”
– Kudos
– Let me “wrap my head around this”
– Let’s “think outside the box”
– I’d like to revise an “addendum” to that piece
– Signing emails with “regards” or “best”
– Using one initial as your name in emails, like “J”
– FYI
– As per our conversation
– “Clearly” and “no worries”
– Please advise (this one strikes a nerve every time I hear it)
– “On brand” and “off brand”
– Can you be a little more “proactive”
– I will be working “off-site”
– She’s really “on top of her game”
– Here is tomorrow’s “agenda”
– At 9AM, we are going to have a “meet and greet” (grip and grin)
– Are you “in the know”
– Thanks for the “assist”
– Tnx
– I climbed that tree, got knocked down a couple of times
– Are we “on the same page?”
– I’ve “been down that road”
– That one “totally fell off the vine”
– Let’s “drill down” on this
– We’ve got to “jump into the pond”
– Let’s keep those “bees in the nest”
– Anything that talks about “team building”
– Let’s “piggyback” this with project A
– Asking a question and then answering it yourself
– Touchpoint
– Upset the apple cart
– Head fake
– We didn’t “see around that corner”

All time favorite email: We are putting together our publicity report for HB 5th and I would love to have a cover to grace the report that mirrors our creative – can you assist?

Who makes this stuff up? Here is a funny article on the topic…

PS – Please, please, please…now, this is just my meager opinion, but I really don’t think anyone past the age of 25 should let the phrase “24/7” leave their lips. I think I saw a minister on TV the other day say that in a sentence…I nearly fainted right there.